Which Would You Rather Be?

You know what? Confident people are NOT Perfectionists. They don’t have to be. Confident people have come to terms with their shortcomings and understand there is always room for improvement. I kept wondering why one of our Leasing Consultants was so non-committal about planning Resident activities. It was really bothering me, to the point where I was actually wasting moments of my driving time pondering the “Why?” instead of singing at the top of my lungs to the radio (which is what I usually do when I am driving.)

Last Friday, at one property, the Leasing Consultant who is a real firecracker, planned a breakfast event for the Residents. I showed up a few minutes after she did and helped with pouring batter and toasting waffles. It was a lot of fun and happily, there was a steady stream of Residents coming in to enjoy a free waffle or two or four. Who’s counting, right?

I would glance periodically out the Clubhouse glass doors toward the parking lot but the other Leasing team member did not arrive until her normal hours. Eventually, I casually asked why she hadn’t arrived early to participate. Her answer? “Well, since I didn’t really plan it, I was afraid it would be a bust.”

Huh??????

I finished the sentence: “… and I don’t put my name on things I cannot control because they may not turn out perfect.”

I see.

Does your team have an individual like this? I am still debating whether or not there is value in having someone who feels unless she is in control then an event will not turn out “perfectly.” Even if no one had shown up and eaten a single waffle, would it have been the end of the world? Of course not. Life is all about taking chances and exploring why a plan is successful or a failure, and I can tell you, we learn more from our failures than we do our successes. But if one cannot even trust and let go of his fear, I think he will remain stuck. That is NOT a good place to be.

Time To Start Believing In Yourself

When I was living in Grand Rapids, Michigan I was like a lot of young mothers whose friends were the other mothers of our children’s classmates we met and bonded with at PTA meetings, field trips and room mother assignments. Chances are you may still be in touch with these other kindred spirits. One of these mothers who became one of my most cherished friends was named Louise. She and her husband were raising three children, two of which were the same ages as my two.

Louise, at that time, was studying to be a teacher and had just gotten through her student teaching phase when I moved – again. Over the next few months of my settling in to a new town, getting my oldest situated in a new school, decorating a new house – you know – life, Louise was hired for her first teaching assignment: Fifth Grade at an inner city school. Like most first year teachers everything was stressful. Her class contained students who wanted to be anywhere than there in a classroom; her principal was obnoxious and hard to deal with and expected more than any one person could deliver. After a few months, Louise noticed that on her drive in to school, her stomach was hurting. Soon she would become nauseated and would vomit each morning, even before the drive.

Ever helpful, I offered, “Maybe you’re pregnant?”

No, that wasn’t it. She went to her doctor and he diagnosed stress as the culprit. I shook my head while we were talking on the phone. “I don’t know, Louise. You’ve never been like that before and having three kids can be pretty stressful!”

Long story short, Louise agreed. She kept going back to her doctor and finally, after the umpteenth visit, he ran some basic tests. She had a CT scan and it revealed a huge tumor in her abdomen. It was cancer. She began treatments. Her persistence in her belief that it was not all in her head, as some had told her, led to the diagnosis and eventual treatment that saved her life.

I kind of marveled at her tenacity! If it had been me, I am sure at that time in my life, I would have discounted that little voice telling me something really was wrong. But Louise did not ignore it. She pursued it. It makes me wonder, still, do we feel confident in our beliefs? Do we ride that tide of belief in our decision-making processes? How easily do we throw in the towel and surrender?

I have tried to embrace Louise’s level of self assuredness in my profession. I want to project a confidence that comes with knowing and believing in what I am doing. After all, if I don’t believe in my community and all it has to offer its Residents, how can I convey to them my joy that this is the place to call home? I know this starts with me and my ability to communicate my love for this community as home. It always starts with one and that one is me.